BS"D
The past elections for the Creedmoor Community Council, a body of pure corruption made up of representatives of each of the fifteen quintillion multiple personalities who make up the Creedmoorer community, were more chaotic than usual. No fewer than ten trillion personalities claimed victory for their fifteen million slates, and another forty trillion personalities actually contested the results by placing requests for emergency welfare and heat assistance with the relevant government agencies despite the sweltering heat in Creedmoor this past week.
As always, the Admou"r meCreedmoor was able to propose a solution to the deadlock in his community by offering a real, live person the position of Chief Dictator of the Creedmoor Community Council.
That person is none other than beleaguered Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the legally wedded sharia husband of Creedmoorer stalwart Aharon Cohen, and therefore a citizen of the Independent Anti-Zionist Republic of Baseless Hatred of Creedmoor.
Therefore, Rabbi Dovid Schmoigerman has offered political and insane asylum to Ahmadinejad should he lose his position, or even one or more limbs, to the will of the Iranian people. He has also granted the Iranian president the dictatorship of his community council in the hope that Ahmadinejad will accept and therefore put an end to the stalemates in both Iran and Creedmoor.
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