Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The Schmoigerman Flu Ravages Creedmoor


It all began when Mohammed Werczberger, a star talmid in Yeshiva Ktana Pesha ve'Resha, had forms sent to Patelowitz Medicaid Mill in East Flatbush for reimbursement. 

Rajesh Patel and Shmilu Arskowitz, two deluxe Creedmoorers with hard earned medical diplomas duly designed and printed by Hakolbishvili and Sons of Rego Park, hit upon a new diagnosis that would earn their esteemed and addled Master, Rabbi Dovid Schmoigerman, trillions upon trillions of dollars of Federal funds for cleanup and flu prevention - and for the greatest Yoim HaAtzamois festivities ever known to Creedmoor.

The diagnosis: The Schmoigerman Flu.

Symptoms: A feverish desire to extort funds from Federal, State, municipal and local bureaucracies for phantom persons and organizations combined with a gross aversion to productive work or even meaningful study of any kind. Characterized by excessive religious fanaticism and a desire to destroy the Zionist state, shared by the EU, the US state department and the Islamic (nether) world.

The number of victims diagnosed: eleven billion.

The number of dwelling, school, yeshiva and storage premises which had to be burned down for insurance in order to sterilize them after exposure to the Schmoigerman Flu virus: three hundred million.

Total square footage affected: Three times the overall square footage inhabitable by mankind on planet Earth.

Total funds due: Eight hundred and fifty quintillion dollars, all payable in EBT cards and food stamps.

More available on this scam of the millenium on Sunday as reports come in about how the Schmoigerman Flu funded super intergalactic Yoim HaAtzamois flag burnings from Monsey to yes, the Pluto formerly known as a planet....

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