Sunday, July 24, 2005

A Capella Concert to Benefit Moisdois Creedmoor

While Creedmoorers do not observe the ban on music during the Three Weeks, during which we who walk in the four watt flickering light bulb that is Chassidus Creedmoor actually celebrate the beginning of golus with fireworks and striptease every night until the Feast of 9 Av, we understand that those who are not yet Creedmoorers do observe this ban. So, we are pleased to present:

CHAZZONIM ZENEN NAARONIM!
THE CHAZZANUS CONCERT OF THE YEAR!
33 Tammuz 2005 (34.07.2005) at 8 PM Sharpton
Featuring:
Reb Lipman Schmaltzherring
Fryed Out Avremel
Abishnormal Farschimmeltbrodt
and the one and only
Menivil ben Zimri (MBZ)
About the performers:
Reb Lipman Schmaltzherring is the Chazzer of K'hal Sinos Chinom d'Creedmoor - Creedmoorer Shil Shul. "Every time I hear him, I want that they should return mayn GELT! His singing is A KAPPOOOORE!" (City Slicker Yitzi magazine)
Fryed Out Avremel has been performing in prisons and asylums since his own parents had him committed to Bellevue at the age of three.
"Mi ze haidiot haze? Ma hu shar bichlal? Le mi et mi? D'haynu, kontzertim hem mi'lizok urefuah shleimo kroiva lavo." (Kfar Chaval magazine)
Abishnormal Farschimmeltbrodt is the latest Creedmoorer star! He is noted for taking songs from outside the Creedmoorer velt and making them © Creedmoor Rabbinical Counci Kosher by re-recording them in Creedmoorer pronunciation.
"M'na raglecho me'shirosov!" (Yated Ne'elam)
Menivil ben Zimri is the son of the late Chelmisher chozzer Zimri Vantzenschlepper. He has been frightening audiences with his performances for over 25 years, and is now fortunately no longer able to screech out high notes. "Someday, our scars and our wounds will disappear. A real singer will descend. In the meantime, from this singer I don't need a thing!" (The Jewish Pressure)
As always, ticket prices will be determined by the weight of the guests - 30 Euro per pound of body weight. Receipts for up to four hundred per cent of the ticket price are provided upon request!
This concert is not to be missed and is recommended for those who are L"A profoundly deaf.

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